Maple Leaf Madness

Hallo from Canada!

[1] I’m pre-sick. You know that feeling where your head is fuzzy, feels like a 50 lb bowling ball, kind of head-achey and all you want to do is lean your head against a cool pane of glass and sleep? yeah, that is how I feel.

[2] On the way to Montreal I sat in front of a guy who, no lie, was either drunk or coming down off of something. He kept moving around, changing seats, coughing & sneezing and as we neared the end of the trip he started spouting profanities. Not to anyone in particular, but just in general. In the end I ended up touching him, to wake him up and let him know we’d arrived. Don’t worry, the only thing I could bring myself to touch was his shoe.

[3] At the Canadian border:

Immigration/Border Guy (IBG): You sure do pack light lady.

Me: I try, makes the travel more fun.

IBG: (inspecting my passport) When was the last time you were in Canada?

Me: Uh, I’m kind of ashamed but I’ve been about everywhere except Canada

IBG: (poking through the stamps in my passport) Yeah, I can see that…

[4] I love the Hotel Intercontinental so much that I want to take it out behind a middle school and get it pregnant* I thought the one in Montreal was nice, but the one in Toronto…class-ay! I also got a free upgrade to the executive level wherein I strolled around and got my free drink, hoity-toity finger sandwiches and some hot tea for my anti-pre-sick campaign. Then I had to go to work, because this afro ain’t gonna oil itself!

[5] When I left Montreal to head to Toronto…it was snowing. God help me, I don’t know if I’m going to make it. I haven’t spent a winter in the US in TWO YEARS!! Now I remember WHY!

[6] In response to all the frenchy-frenchness of Canada I have adopted an almost sociopathic southern drawl, insisting upon replying to the “Bonjour Madame!” with “Howdy, Howdy!” Yes, yes I am that brand of ridiculous. 

*30 Rock reference

4 thoughts on “Maple Leaf Madness”

  1. I have been in bed (alone) by 8:30 all week. I had some of the same symptons – I did work everyday in my cubicle though. Enjoy the hotel and the “grand life”. Ask for “grits” for breakfast – Nelson did 🙂
    Build a Canadian snow man for me.

  2. Sicky Poo,

    I hope your sicky sick sicklies goes away soon. I’m responding to drowning academic students with my peppy emails of academic support. I don’t feel sick but the pumpkin muffin I had this morning has offered some wholesome satisfaction, not so wholesome, well I’m gonna keep that to myself. I hope all is well Dia Snack and you continue to make those love connections while you travel . . . come on, tell the truth, you slobbed that man down to wake him up =)

    Make a little snow angel for me, why, ’cause I’m worth it.

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